Online dating tips for men over 40 romeo and juliet speed dating

We waited a long time to focus on settling down, and now we’re facing a somewhat distressing fact of life: Once you’re over 40, there is a diminished pool of men to choose from.

So we figured out – and accepted – that the right man does not magically appear when you’re ready for him.

As to the “why” behind the lack of date-nights, nearly 60 percent say they don’t need a relationship to be happy.

More than 40 percent said they were considering it, but not actually doing it.

But according to TODAY’s “This is 50” survey results, only 18 percent of single people in their 50s said they were dating.

On the positive side, the age 50-plus daters seem to be pretty darn smart when choosing a date-mate.

Also, since you’re done with the aforementioned race to beat the biological clock, you can just date who you want, when you want, for as long as they are interesting to you. When you’re in your 40s, you know a lot more about the nature of sexual attraction Sure, you’re mature enough to think someone who might not be obviously attractive is worth investing some time in, but you also know that a guy who gives you a negative feeling – either physically or intellectually – is not someone you want to see again. You might come to realize that marriage is not for everyone I have plenty of happily married friends; but a couple of my closest friends compromised their happiness because they were afraid to be alone.

And since you are now a wise, mature adult (or better at acting the part), you know it’s not a big deal to cut a guy loose by telling him that you’re not feeling a click. On the other hand, you might feel a huge click with a guy who doesn’t share any of your interests But since you’re more mature and wise, you get that shared values and personality characteristics are more important than shared interests. Beware the newly-divorced You will hear a lot of people talk about snagging good catches when they’re leaving their first marriages. But remember that newly-divorced men come with a lot of baggage. They might not know how to take care of themselves, and they might have complicated custody issues that keep them from travelling. Single, independent, accomplished 40-year-olds know there’s nothing to fear in being alone. Even your feminist friends will treat your single state as a project they need to fix …and they will spend much creative energy trying to find you a match.

The grown-up dater gives him a reasonable amount of time to show up, and then says a big “So what! If you are dealing with a grown-up man he will appreciate and respect you for it. (Because after all, your type hasn't worked or you would be reading this.) 5.

Depending on who it’s coming from, this can be flattering or very insulting (especially the friends who urge you to compromise).

But remember this: It’s only human for people to want to feel validated in their own life decisions by seeing you reflect them with your own.

Related links Where are the (normal) single men hiding?

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That decision can be pretty liberating – especially when you’re dating in your 40s: There’s no biological clock ticking away, which can put pressure on new relationships. You don’t have to limit yourself to men in your age group Not to feed the cougar cliché, but by the time you reach 40, the social stigma of dating younger men is so passé.

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